Not Me, It’s the Hormones!

In the very first and quite amazing scene from the movie Tanu weds Manu Returns (the mental asylum fight) where Madhavan scientifically puts it ” I think my wife is suffering from bipolar disorder. She has anxiety issues, acute hysteria, thyroid problems..” further explaining how she is fine for a duration and the next moment even the smallest of things gives her mood the backseat. To which the doctor coolly replies that if we go by these symptoms then he means to say that every woman in the world suffers from bipolar disorder. Isn’t it highly insensitive that we women are at the center of all the nagging girlfriend and complaining wife jokes?

But don’t think for a moment that a man’s life is easy. I have written a post dedicated to how difficult things are for men.

Coming back to the current subject, though I have been experiencing some or the other symptoms then and now but was not able to exactly pin it down to stuff like PMS or hormonal imbalances till a few years back. I actually observed that there are some days when nothing could lift my mood and I will be an emotional wreck. While there are others where I am as jolly and easy going as I can be.

Ya, it’s true. We don’t make excuses when we blame it on our hormones. It’s very much a reality of our existence.  Well while google… I mean your doctor may give you a better analysis of the scientific cause behind it with all that estrogen and progesterone talks. PMS and Period Struggles are real. 

Below I provide a first hand account of what goes in my head when am at the negative end of things and how women don’t want to be dismissed as the nagging wife or girlfriend at that particular point.  Just let me know in the comments below that for how many of you this regular upheaval in the brain rings a bell.

Do you think we like it when we shout or make a fuss about everything? Things which on any normal day, we would dismiss as cute and let go off easily, suddenly begins to irritate us so much. We on our own are at a total loss thinking how to stop that tear flowing down our cheeks or how not to pick up an argument with you due to the things you left undone. You calculate in your mind “Oh, it must be that time of the month” and simply choose to ignore and wait for the phase to pass.

If only you would know the stuff that we are dealing with? Sore breasts, bloating, abdominal cramping, food cravings and what not. Add to that the bouts of emotional mayhem. I remember spending days when I could not get rid of the sinking feeling in my brain. The hopelessness seems to have tightened its grip over me. Sometimes it feels like, the entire burden of the world is on my shoulders and the anxiety making me want to run. Then at others, it feels like nobody understands me.  And then again the others when I get easily irritated and mad and in turn drive those around me mad.

These are the days when we especially don’t want to be dismissed with statements like “You girls are always crying and complaining”, or worse when you return our frustration with your irritation and simply sit on the couch to avoid even talking to us. And when confronted all you have to say is that you are too scared to say anything as you don’t want to escalate things further. Leaving us alone to deal with it and waiting for it to pass is the worst thing you can do. Let me also emphasize that it is not always about “that time of the month”. There are other lifestyle induced imbalances like diet and stress which can create hormonal imbalance.

We know at times we are difficult to handle and put your patience to test but we assure you that it is nothing which can’t be achieved with a little bit extra attention. Pay heed to the screaming of our hormones which might just be requesting that for once our breakfast be served in bed or might be hoping that you could call thrice today just to know how are we doing. Be there for us and listen to us.

And while you are at it, don’t forget to get that tub of ice cream with extra chocolate chips. Coz as Marilyn Monroe puts it “If you can’t handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best” 😉