When the Baby won’t Sleep

Venturing into parenthood, the one thing everyone seems to be prepared about is the sleepless nights. It is one of the most talked about experiences of early parenthood. Not just your friends and family who are recent parents, even the celebrities who become new parents don’t fail to draw attention to this change in their lives, when the baby doesn’t sleep. So no doubt you establish an idea of what’s in store for you. But ya let me tell you, just like no two babies are same, the experience also varies for every parent.

By rule, newborns sleep around 18 hours a day, waking up every 2-3 hours to feed. There are days which will sail smoothly on a fixed pattern. But then again there will be days when you want to tear your hair apart as the baby just refuses to sleep. I remember there used to be nights when baby would be awake the whole night and finally fall asleep at 5 or 6 in the morning.

Fun Fact: A common notion which I have heard from the elders in the family is that babies born in daytime would keep awake the whole night and sleep during day and vice versa. Some days it would feel true and some days not.

Whatever be the reasons, if you find yourself googling at 2 o’clock in the morning, how to put the baby to sleep then below I have listed a few things which either singly or in combination have helped with the same.

7 Tips to Help Baby to Sleep Better

Feeding & Diaper Change

Initially you need to rule out factors like hunger or need of a diaper change. A hungry baby will never sleep. I repeat, never. Therefore, make sure whether you are breastfeeding or formula feeding, that your child is full before expecting them to sleep. Once you rule this out, check for soiled diapers and change as required. Only when you have a well fed baby in clean diapers can you start complaining about them not sleeping.

If in a dilemma about diaper usage read here.

Temperature

Ensure that the room is neither too hot nor cold for the baby. For newborns the rule generally is one layer more than what you would wear. So if you are wearing say 2 layers of clothing, put 3 layers for them.

Swaddling

Swaddling is the technique of wrapping up the baby in a soft cloth or a blanket to keep them warm and cozy. It is especially recommended in the first few weeks when the baby is adjusting to the outside environment all the while missing the comfort of the womb. But take care that the material you use is weather appropriate and that you don’t wrap the baby too tightly. You can learn the proper way to do it from someone who is well versed. We learnt it from the hospital staff in the initial days after delivery.

Massage

Who doesn’t feel relaxed after a good massage and the same goes for your baby too. A nice, loving massage done with a good quality baby oil not only soothes the baby but also proves to be a beautiful bonding experience.

Note: I followed the strict no massage for the first 14 days as recommended by my paediatrician. The baby’s skin is very tender and any contact with external substances can lead to a reaction. So I recommend this only for babies older than 2 weeks and only by using a good, reliable baby oil.

Soothing Music

Try singing to them baby songs and lullabies. Does not matter what you think about your singing but remember your baby loves your voice. And in case you are unable to, you can also play these lullabies in any device at a soft volume. My personal favourites are “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” and “Chanda Mama Door k”.

There are plenty and soon you will figure out which one really works for your baby. Using white noise is something which I won’t recommend to use frequently or for longer duration. When nothing else seems to work and your body really needs a rest, you can go for it. Not going into technicality, white noise is a special signal which masks all other sounds. It is known to be soothing for babies as it is said to resemble in utero sound. My reason for not encouraging the use is to not create any dependency. After all the baby needs to be accustomed to worldly sounds and learn sleeping with them. Also it might not work on all babies or on same baby every time.

Baby’s Sleep Schedule

Look through your baby’s sleep schedule. If your baby sleeps much of the day then it is very obvious that they won’t feel sleepy at night. I know however tempting it is to encourage them to sleep during the day so as to get time to finish your work, but it is better to establish a sleep pattern focused on sleeping during night. One way to help them distinguish between night and day is keep the night surroundings as quite as possible during night time sleeping. During the day you can go around the household in normal voices when your baby is asleep. Keep loud noises away but don’t tip toe either.

Other Discomforts

Check for other discomforts especially if the baby is also crying inconsolably in addition to not sleeping. The most common cause for discomfort in small babies range from colic, rashes or ear infection. Consult your paediatrician to diagnose correctly.

Tip: Colicky babies generally benefit from a car ride. Taking them for a drive soothes them and they get a good nap. But don’t drive if you are yourself sleep deprived or tired.

A warm bath is also known to relax the baby and help them sleep but I have not tried it at night time owing to the risk of cold exposure as evenings in Bangalore usually turn chilly.

Once you have tried all of the above but you still have wide open eyes looking up to you, then you got to stay awake doing whatever your baby wants you to do and just make it a family time reading to your baby or playing with them. And no matter how many of your “Netflix n Chill” plans get ruined by your baby’s keeping awake, remember this phase is not gonna last forever. In most cases, babies start sleeping for longer duration by 4 months of age. Till then keep calm and Happy Parenting!

Signing off with some mom humour.